Tag Archives: sadness

Why?

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This won’t be the last time that I write for you

But it may be the first that I don’t know the words for what’s true

I’m angered and saddened, and shocked to the floor

And I don’t know how to talk to you, now you’re not here anymore.

I wish you were here so I could slap your sweet face.

Or hug you, or scold you… But your soul’s been displaced.

And this is a time that I wish I could pray

Or believe in my heart that I could see you some day.

But all I can do is just sob and ask why

You didn’t love you enough to keep giving living a try.

Wesley. I loved you very much. You were a huge part of my coming of age, and the first boy I ever loved. I’m rocked by what you’ve done to yourself, and I’m angry and sad. Sadder than I ever thought possible. I could cry an ocean and still have tears for you. You were a light and a joy to behold, and everyone who knew you couldn’t help but love you. There’s a Wesley sized hole in the world now. You will never be forgotten.

A little morbid

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Broken cycle

Hollow tones are singing

Making sound of hallowed ground

And in my ears what’s ringing

Is the wrongness that I’ve found

For underfoot are boxes

Filled with what should be returned

Under lids with locks and

Removed from cycle earned

I feel my heart is breaking

As it pounds against my breast

Surrounds me-life forsaken

Dusty treasures, concrete chests

My bones can feel the wrongness,

Such a cold and bitter ache

This knowing that’s been long stressed

The circle’s set to break

Death’s to me no ending

There’s life among the bones

Flesh is fodder pending

Return to earthly home

Upsets me not, such feeding

Or breeding on the shell

When time has come for leaving

The form in which I’ve dwelled

Disturbing more-entombment

To rot alone-true death

Not musky new enwombment

For smaller creatures breath

This septic space I’m walking

Cries for breaking ground

The dead to me are talking

From under weighty bounds

I wish I could release them

Stir bones to fertile earth

But flesh un-rot’s been poisoned

And return would make it worse

 

 

relief to write

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Ungrateful

No one thanks the sun for warming

Or the gentle earth for forming

Sweetest rain for falling

They take for granted calling

What lives to do it’s duty

No one thanks the sky for beauty

So no one’s thanking me for loving

And I can feel myself becoming

A part of back-drop scenery

A pretty bit of greenery

Like trees, at once were planted

Now are took at last for granted

Until fall comes to fruition

Then comes in a new transition

And fruit comes ripe for plucking

And the sounds of gentle sucking

On love-life gave quite freely

And thanks would be-ideally

Proffered after supping

Yet in the end, I’m cupping

My empty cup for sipping

Pretend to take, but slipping

And sighing, dropped bereftly

I take the love what’s left me

And thank me ever-kindly

-A shot at those who blindly

Take all without compensing

The one what does dispensing